To celebrate the active transfer window I was going to write a profile on each of the new signings but since there are only about 3 of note (or that have been heard of by the world) and that there are stupid internationals breaking up the start of the season I have taken it upon myself to write a celebration (well something) for all of the players and throwing my opinion into the ring for the lions to tear apart. It is also something to stop me drinking my sorrows away at the rate of a idiot chairman, I live near Newcastle and am fully aware of the damage an angry Geordie can do, don't upset a city of them. I heard he is considering buying Sunderland and merging the 2 teams because he wants to be hated by everyone in the North East!

First though, here is my summary of the transfer window. Before I get to us the Manchester Saga has become a nightmare. It looks like every team needs a billionaire (I hope we can find one more charismatic than Usmanov). The funny thing is City have spent £30 odd mil on Robinho which goes straight into Real Madrid's Ch******no Ron**do transfer fund. United buying another world class striker makes no sense to me, what’s wrong with Rooney and Tevez? Madness, especially when you are supposed to be broke. We had the money and bought no one, a cunning move there!


Arsenal have bought:-

- Nasri, he looks amazing, could be the solution to our attacking problems.

- Ramsey, too young to make a first team impact yet one for the future! some are calling him the next Jack Wilshire.

- Silvestre, I assume backup.

- Bischoff, some sort of midfielder with an average career that Arsene is going to play out of position and he will become a world class player!

- Vela is effectively a new signing because of the work permit. I am so excited about that boy (not like that)


We have sold/lost:-

- Gilberto, he was loyal and I think that being overlooked for captaincy broke his strong spirit especially since he was Brazil captain and vice captain to El Tel.

- Hleb, £12m? Thanks, that’s too kind! We didn't want him anyway.

- Flamini, a shame we lost him, it’s a shame we made him and he showed now loyalty and ran to the cheque book like Harry Hill's wife (in the pre TV burp days), disappointed not angry.

- Lehmann, some say the key to the untouchables, others say mad. I say both, the premiership will miss you thank you for your loyalty that is the way to leave a club.

- Hoyte, A true Gooner, loved the club and its always sad to have to let go of a genuine fan but he wasn't good enough.


The season kicks off for real in 10 days time; prepare to hold your collars!